The Best Food Writing I’ve Read

I subscribed to Saveur for several years but never finished any of the long articles — which weren’t that long. This should have puzzled me, but it didn’t. A month ago, however, I got the audiobook of Secret Ingredients, the New Yorker anthology about food. I was surprised how many of the articles I didn’t want to listen to. 90%? Usually I like New Yorker anthologies and read most of the articles. I’m a more tolerant listener than reader which made the comparision even worse.

Here’s my explanation. Food writing is like downtown Edinburgh. Its main street has shops on one side, on the other side a park. What should have been the economically most lively street in the city is rendered half as effective as it might be by the fact that half of it isn’t businesses. As something to write about, food is similar. Just as a park is economically inert, food is psychologically inert. Like a park, food can be pleasant (to read about) but it doesn’t act. It isn’t alive. This is why those Saveur feature articles were hard to read, I realized. They resembled flat lists: We cooked and ate X, Y, and Z. It’s incredibly hard to make that sort of thing fun to read. The best article in Secret Ingredients was John McPhee’s profile of Euell Gibbons. It’s a mini-adventure story, with an interesting guy at the center. The food is . . . a condiment.

This is why I’m so impressed by the chapter “Waizhou, USA” in The Fortune Cookie Chronicles by Jennifer 8. Lee. Waizhou means “out of state” — in this case, away from New York City. It’s the story of a family who left New York to run a Chinese restaurant in a small Georgia town. It took a shocking turn that Lee didn’t expect. Police took the children away. The father was arrested. “The offices pointed to the burn scars from cooking oil on the parents’ arms and said that was evidence that the couple had a history of fighting.” This had horrible and ramifying effects. “Oh, I can’t eat there anymore,” said a lawyer, “that’s the DV [domestic violence] case.” The teenage daughter starts using the court system to punish her mother. The parents are arrested again. “They had violated court rules by driving near their children’s foster home. Because they had sold their restaurant they were considered a flight risk.” Eventually they get their children back, and go back to New York. It’s a whole slice of life I’d never read about before. Enormously emotional and unpredictable. The father enjoyed jail. “When I was in jail for two days, it was really relaxing,” he told Lee.

The Bechdel Test and Denise Richards

I loved Alison Bechdel’s Fun Home. It was one of the best books I read in 2007. So I was pleased to learn of the Bechdel Test, which can be applied to TV and movies:

To pass it your movie [or TV show] must have the following:

1) there are at least two named female characters, who

2) talk to each other about

3) something other than a man.

Few movies or TV shows pass it, said Jennifer Kesler.

I came across this test after spending a pleasant morning analyzing data while listening to the first six episodes of Denise Richards: It’s Complicated which I found on YouTube. (Such as part 1 of Episode 1.) The show consisted mainly of two named female characters — Denise and sister, Denise and friend, Denise and daughter — talking to each other about something other than a man.

I was surprised how much I liked it. When Denise and her dad (who lives with her) interview people to be her assistant, it was amusing (Denise has about 20 pets; one applicant said she didn’t like pets); when she gets mad at an entertainment journalist, it was forgivable; when she enters her nephew’s room to find him and his friends looking at a Playboy with her on the cover, it was unforgettable. The entertainment journalist wants to know why she is doing the reality show. “My [recently dead] mom wanted me to do it,” Denise says. The journalist can barely keep from laughing. “A deathbed wish?” she says. Denise got upset, so let me answer: The better you know almost anyone, the more you like them.

How to avoid demonization.

More. Gillian Flynn, one of Entertainment Weekly‘s TV reviewers, hated the show — gave it a D. Could reviewers be overly negative because they are forced to watch?

Who I’d Like to Meet

At dinner I asked my friend who he’d like to meet. “Good question,” he said. Let me try to answer it:

1. John Horton Conway. A Princeton math professor who’s combined math and human interest better than anyone since John Von Neumann. I especially like his work on numbers and games and The Book of Numbers, which he wrote with Richard Guy.

2. Lauren Collins. She and Mark Singer are the best writers at The New Yorker. As I recently blogged, I loved her profile of Pascal Dangin.

3. Chimamanda Adichie. I blogged about a recent short story of hers. Reading her reminds me how I used to read lots of fiction and how much I liked it.

The person I don’t know who I most wish would write another book is Renata Adler. If a book can be stillborn, Private Capacity, supposed to be published in 2002, was that. From Wikipedia: “Renata Adler’s investigation of the Bilderberg group reveals the true history of the organization, its membership and its nebulous function. With an astonishing cache of Bilderberg archives and secret files, Adler charts the history of the organization and the extent of its power.” Sounds like it exists, doesn’t it? It ranks 5 million on Amazon, maybe because I ordered a copy. Second most: Ben Cheever. I loved Selling Ben Cheever.

Fannie Mae and The Black Swan

In response to the trouble at Fannie Mae — its stock plunged — we have this:

“There is a sort of a panic going on and that’s not what ought to be,” said Senator Christopher J. Dodd, the Connecticut Democrat who heads the Senate banking committee. “The facts don’t warrant that reaction, in my view.”

Mr. Dodd said that he was persuaded by conversations with Mr. Paulson and Mr. Bernanke that the two companies “are fundamentally sound and strong.”

Nassim Taleb begs to differ — a year ago:

The government-sponsored institution Fanny Mae, when I look at their risks, seems to be sitting on a barrel of dynamite, vulnerable to the slightest hiccup. But not to worry: their large staff of scientists deemed these events “unlikely.”

A footnote on p. 226 of The Black Swan, published April 2007. Asked to comment on the Fannie Mae situation, Taleb replied, “I discuss events before, not after. I despise postdicters.”

Short Story of the Year

The Headstrong Historian” by Chimamanda Adiche is the best short story I have read in The New Yorker in years, and in the book I am writing now — on self-experimentation — I will quote from it:

How she had puzzled over words like “wallpaper” and “dandelions” in her textbooks, unable to picture them.

No wonder the author won the Orange Prize last year for her novel Half of a Yellow Sun.

An essay by Adichie about being called “sister” contains the following:

The word “racist” should be banned. It is like a sweater wrung completely out of shape; it has lost its usefulness. It makes honest debate impossible, whether about small realities such as little boys who won’t say hello to black babysitters or large realities such as who is more likely to get the death penalty.

In college I wrote an essay saying essentially the same thing about the word scientific — that it was too vague and pompous to be helpful.

A Chimamanda Adiche website.

Lessons Learned about Book Writing

1. At Writers With Drinks I met a woman who is writing a memoir. Since I had actually published a book, she wondered if I had any advice about finding a publisher. I said don’t get your hopes up. Practically no one makes anything resembling a living from writing books. (I meant books like memoirs — what a friend calls real books.) It’s a hobby. I asked her if she’d heard this before. No, she said. She said she’s around people who are “positive” whereas I was “realistic.”

2. My friend Phil Price is a researcher at Lawrence Berkeley Laboratory. A few years ago he wrote a chapter (“”Assessing uncertainties in the relationship between inhaled particle concentrations, internal deposition, and health effects”) for a handbook-like compendium. It was a big mistake, he said. There were three problems: 1. It was much harder to write than he expected. 2. The quality of the final product was lower than he expected. 3. The audience was tiny. Maybe 11 people would end up reading what he’d written.

While They Slept

From a review of Kathryn Harrison’s new book While They Slept, about a boy who murders his parents:

When Billy Gilley is 13, stealing cigarettes leads him to the Children’s Services Division, where the boy trustingly told a social worker about his family: the drinking, fighting, extreme verbal abuse in a family where customarily, after sentencing by his mother, his father would tie him to a tractor tire in order to immobilize him for beating with a rubber hose. He described for the social worker how his parents were, in Billy’s terms, “crazy and unfit.”

The child told his story, and the social worker’s response was to repeat it to those abusive parents. Furious, they demanded to speak with him in private, so that he recanted and said he had been lying. The parents threatened to sue the agency, which fired the social worker and destroyed the record of her conversation with Billy, leaving only the annotation that the child was a liar. . . .Having acquired literacy skills in prison, he writes and illustrates children’s books. In these books, large-eyed animals play an important role: children are in trouble or distress, and human adults cannot understand or help. The animals understand the children, and bring them to safety.

This reminds me of two things. Many years ago, such as in the 1920s, cancer was a terrible thing and a total mystery. People didn’t like to talk about it. Likewise the social worker’s actions are a terrible thing and a total mystery. What should be done about such behavior? Nobody wants to talk about it. The other thing this reminds me of is the Ten Commandments. Here is something else no one talks about: There is no commandment against child abuse. No stealing: yes. No murder: yes. No adultery: yes. No child abuse: no. Stealing is worse than child abuse? Huh?

Well, at least the review is titled “Speaking the Unspeakable.”

Murakami, Baseball, and Inspiration

About ten years ago Haruki Murakami, the author, gave a talk at UC Berkeley. in which he said he had decided to try to become a writer during a baseball game — specifically, when someone hit a single to left field. I told this story as often as possible. My listeners were always puzzled. It made no sense. Was he kidding?

Now Murakami has told the story in print. Turns out it was a double, not a single. And I missed another crucial detail. Murakami was a “fairly devoted Yakult Swallows fan.” It was the Swallows lead-off batter who hit the double. Now the story makes sense. Something wonderful had just happened on the field. Surprising, too. Wonderful unpredictable things happen, Murakami realized. They could happen to him. “Something flew down from the sky at that instant,” he wrote, “and, whatever it was, I accepted it.”

How Amazon Computes Book Ranks

Given how interested authors are in the Amazon rank of their books, it’s curious how little I can find about how those ranks are computed. Amazon won’t say. Let me try to figure it out.

Is it based on the number of copies sold in some unit of time — say, one day? Surely not. If the unit is too small, then most books will have zero copies sold. That’s too many ties. If the unit is too large — say, one week — it won’t change very quickly. That’s boring.

That leaves average time between orders — what an animal psychologist would call interorder interval (IOI). If one copy is sold at 10:00 am on Monday and the next copy is sold at 12 noon on Tuesday, the IOI is 26 hours. This is easy to track for each book and can discriminate between books that don’t sell many copies.

How many IOIs does Amazon use to compute the rank? One, five, twenty? Surely more than one. Using just one would be too noisy and would do a terrible job of discriminating best-sellers. This morning my editor asked me if Stephen Dubner’s Freakonomics blog post about SLD yesterday helped its Amazon rank. I checked: the rank was about 5600 (better than usual). This afternoon, I checked again: the rank was about 1700. I am sure there is no delayed effect of a mention on the NY Times website; Dubner’s post must have had its biggest effect on sales yesterday. So why is the rank improving today? Because Amazon uses a fixed number of IOIs (or at least a maximum number) to compute the rank and today the longer ones are still being replaced by shorter ones. In other words, the rate of sales, although lower today than yesterday, is still higher than usual.

According to this article, a book ranked about 2000 sells about 10 copies per day (on Amazon, I assume). SLD’s current rank (about 2000) reflects an average of long IOIs (before yesterday) and short ones (yesterday and today). Yesterday, therefore, it must have sold more than 10 copies — but this wasn’t enough to get rid of all the long IOIs. So the rank is based on more than 10 IOIs.

Further than that I cannot go.

Using Amazon rank to compute sales. The Bookscan/Amazon-rank correlation I show in that post indicates that a book with an Amazon rank of about 2000 sells about 40 Bookscan copies per day, which is why I assume that the 10 copies per day mentioned above refers just to Amazon sales.